just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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