Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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