I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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