I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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