i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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