in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
MIDGETS
????
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
