I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize