last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
My underwear smells like fireworks.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
