i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
