i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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