i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize