id be glad to
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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