Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
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I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
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It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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