Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
