I bet he comes in French.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
