So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i barfeds in our rink
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
