Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
