I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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