I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
