Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
