Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Walk of Shame today included voting.
then he tried to convert me to islam
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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