nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
