do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
