The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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