i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize