We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
