so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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