We won't sleep together?
I wannas sexs uuuuu
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
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