just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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