she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize