Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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