so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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