Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize
