are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize