Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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