I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize