Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
