this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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