This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner