Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
