just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
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Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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