worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Randomize
