the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
