New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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