You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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