Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
He felt like a one man threesome
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
