oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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