on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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