'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
