Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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